Friday, February 28, 2014

Don't know .. If you know

A lot of changes have been going on in my life the last year or two..  My husband had a stroke and then after that we were told he had "Lewy Body" which is a form of dementia.   We are dealing with that as best as we can with all the knowledge we have been given.  
He also has a heart condition which, he has had  for a few years, that we found out about 3 years ago.

Well, the day after Christmas, when daughters, grandchildren and even a new great grandson were here for the holidays,  I went into the bedroom  thinking he was getting ready for bed and I heard this noise and realized it was his breathing or trying to breathe, I called all cell phones of the ones here and guess they were talking or a sleep., I yelled but, being in a two story home that didn't work so, I just called 911 and when they came to the front door it did wake up or get attention of a few. Bless theirs hearts they all stayed  and extended their time here to help me with the 24/7 we had to be at the hospital.

My hubby spent a week and a half in the hospital with pneumonia!  The reason he was in the hospital was taken care of in a week, lungs were clear, blood was fine  but, he still was not responding to us at all. then the uneducated care for his dementia took over and I told them he was leaving this hospital. I went to  the CEO and told her I am taking him out of here.   He was a zombie..they were giving him 4 times the amount of what he was on before he went in.   Maybe, I should not put this on my blog but, would like to give a heads up..that all hospitals do not know what is right and administer drugs to patients when they are not qualified in that field.

I had to order a wheelchair (in fact I bought one) before they would let him leave because, I flat told them I am taking him home, you people are going to kill him!  
I bought the walker, the shower seat everything to make it safe for him 
I had home healthcare that is almost completed with what they feel is needed but, when they first came, they were asking me if he had a will or if I had power of attorney?  This man was completely in another place.

  First thing, I got him into the shower and using the real  potty which the hospital had not done and got him moving around with a lot of leaning on me.  (My back still hurts)  
Within two weeks he was using the walker and then walking alone and was coming back to being the man we knew before!
I am not saying this was easy, but it was better than leaving him in the hospital for 3 more weeks as they wanted to do.
I am a very strong willed  and focused person!
Guess,  I have a wheelchair and walker to store now..hey..I may need it someday.

My husband will never be the man he was in the years before but, he will always be the man I loved and married years ago, I may not get the sleep I did before but, with God's help,  I will always be here to help him through and help him with all I can do! 

I love each and everyone of you bloggers, we may have never met and maybe never will but, you are my
 lifeline and I enjoy our breath of relaxation and creativity we have together
Thank you!.


  1. You and your dear husband are in my prayers. And just so it is very clear....I love that you followed your instincts to protect and fight for your hubby. I know that must have been an incredibly hard decision....Almost twenty years ago (I was in my mid twenties) My Grandpa's cancer came back and he was in a local Florida hospital and he was hallucinating, crying and begging us to get him out of there....seeing birds fly over my head, the whole nine yards. The thing that shocked me was all of the "adults" My uncle, aunts and even my Mom were drowning in grief and tears and literally couldn't talk to the doctors or think straight. I had to step up for them, I laid down next to the only father I'd ever known and just like my own children, talked him into a nap, then walked everyone out into the hallway and demanded to speak to his Doctor "Right "bleeping" now. Come to find out after he consulted 2 different psychologists (who specialized in drug interactions) his med's were literally making him crazy. and within 4 hours of switching them....He came back to us.

    So you fight for your man....and if you need a me and I'll give you my number:-)

    1. Thank you Christine, having gone through what you did with your Grandpa, you more than anyone can understand that feeling! Some-days I get so overwhelmed that I let it get me down.
      You are a darling person for caring.

  2. Betty, I feel for you. You are one courageous and strong willed woman. You have to be now days. One has to be in charge of their own, because there are so many institutions trying to take over and control us. My husband's mother had pretty much the same thing happen to her. She had a stroke and was hospitalized. They over medicated her and she was doing and saying strange things. Her kids stepped in and demanded she be taken off most of those drugs. She then responded and was more like her usual self. It's a scary situation to think most of these hospitals and care homes just want to sedate this poor people so they don't have to bother with them. kudos to you for taking charge. You are an amazing woman. You and your husband have my prayers. Big hugs, Linda

    1. Linda, it is amazing at the number of people that this happens to and you are right about sedating them so they don't have to deal with them!
      Thank you Linda, for everything!

  3. You did a great job Betty. It's wonderful that you stood up for him so valiantly. I know it was a very bad situation. The hospitals are more worried about liability than responsibility for the proper care of the individual. We saw a bit of this happen to Dan's father. His mom had no clue and just went along with the program. We all need someone to be an advocate for us- you did really did your part and he's better because of it.


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